Fred Gleeck

Hi. My name is Fred Gleeck. I've put up this site because I want to find a GREAT relationship. I've made some bad choices in the past and want to change that.

If after you read this you think we MIGHT be a good match, send me an email. If you feel comfortable, leave me your phone number. We can speak and then decide on the next step. My email address is: fredgleeck@mac.com

I'm not looking to get married tomorrow, but I'm open to finding someone that is willing to get serious if we click. Everything I've put on this site is 100% honest. I've laid it all out. Thanks for taking the time to read what's here.

Quick Overview:

Who I am?

Who am I looking for? Someone who is . . . .

Things You Should Know About ME

About me Physically

My Parents

I was my parents' only child (at the time). I now have a half brother and half sister since my Dad remarried after he and my Mom split up. This happened right after high school.. I always got along very well with my Dad but not so with my Mother. She was a very interesting person but used to try and do a lot of "guilt-tripping" which I just did NOT tolerate. The best way to describe the difference between them was when I would call home from college to my mother she would answer the phone: Why haven't you called? My Dad would say: Thank you for calling. Guess who I enjoyed calling more?

My Mom died in December of 2004 after a long stay in a nursing home. I felt relieved for her. She had been there for 6 years. My Dad died in July of this year. He was 92 and in "fair" health and losing a lot of his mental faculties. He was sharp as a tack until he was 88, but he had slowed down a lot. One interesting thing is that as he got older he went from super serious to fun and jovial. Too bad that didn't start 40 years earlier! But, he was a great guy.

Upbringing

I was born in Japan and raised in the Philippines. My Dad was a diplomat. Many people think diplomats make a lot of money. NOT true. Depending on their titles, they may have a lot of power, but money isn't the main attraction of the profession. I went to private school in Manila and left the Philippines after high school to go to college in the US.

Academics

After graduating from High School in the Philippines I started college at Wake Forest in North Carolina. I had dreams of becoming a professional golfer, having won the Philippine Junior Amateur Golf Championship two years in a row while in high school. I still play a little golf now adays. Wake Forest had one of the best golf teams (still does) and I went there for less than a full semester when I first left high school in the Philippines. I didn't like it there because it was TOO conservative. No intervisitation between men's and women's dorms, etc. YIKES!

I quit Wake Forest in the fall of 1974 and went back to the Philippines for Thanksgiving and Christmas. In January of 1975 I transferred to the University of Florida (in Gainesville). I LOVED it there. I had a great time. I majored in marketing and psychology and graduated with High Honors. It was a state school, what can I tell you! I love school and I love learning. I've often thought it would be fun to be a professor. Maybe in my "next" life.

I then went on to get my Master's Degree in International Business as a place called "The American Graduate School of International Management" (also known as Thunderbird). After I got that degree I moved to New York City and was promptly fired by 5 Fortune 500 companies in a row, proving conclusively I should be self-employed. Which I've been for the past 21 years.

Movies/Theatre

I LOVE movies. I'm also one of the few straight men you'll find who like (and sometimes know the words to) musicals. I could see a movie or go to the theatre virtually every night of the week. One time, on a college break I went to NYC and saw 8 plays in 7 days. I loved it.

What I Do for Work

I call myself an information marketer. I create, market and sell information in various forms including ebooks, books, audios and videos. These in addition to live events like seminars. I've got a lot of websites, and I own a few pieces of software. I do a lot of seminars and speaking engagements and I absolutely love it. I also coach others to do the same. I'm very challenged by the work I do and love learning new stuff everyday.

I've written 11 books and I try and crank out 3 or 4 a year. In my field, this is the best way to promote yourself, your products, and services.

I have been on my own and self-employed for the last 20+ years and can't imagine doing it any other way. I LOVE what I do and get a ton of satisfaction from doing it.

If you want to see more about the work side of my life, look at: www.FredGleeck.com.

Friends

I have a lot of good friends. Male and female. If you have a problem with a guy who has women friends, then I'm not your guy. You should be secure enough to handle that. I LOVE women. I love them as people. I love them as friends. I do NOT subscribe to the "Harry Met Sally" concept that every guy wants to sleep with every woman he meets including his friends. To fool around with one of my friends would feel incestuous.

I like having friends come over and even stay for a couple of days if they are from out of town. Doesn't bother me. Growing up as an only kid makes me enjoy a certain amount of company around the house.

Sex

I was raised by parents who were very open minded in this area. So much so that I gave serious consideration to becoming a sex therapist. I'm NOT making this up. That is until I found out you needed a degree in clinical psych and then spoke to an actual sex therapist who explained that it was pretty boring (hard to believe, but true). I'm REALLY well adjusted in this area. Nothing freaks me out. I happen to be 100% straight but have dated a number of women who were bisexual. Doesn't bother me at all.

I would NOT get along with someone who has a lot of hang-ups in this area. In my last relationship, the person who I was with really didn't like sex that much. I do. I think it's one of the greatest joys of life. I like pleasing someone else more than I like pleasing myself. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the ME part as well.

I understand the difference between having lustful sex and having loving sex. We're people, but we're still animals. I like them both.

Years ago I was with someone who asked me if I liked sex a lot. I said yes. I asked her the same question. She said yes as well. Only problem was that a lot to HER was twice a week, to me, it was twice a day (as I get older these numbers MAY change). Big difference and later, a big problem. I'm a bit older than I was when that happened, but don't count me out. I'm in good shape. Sex is what adults do for fun. If you like to have fun, you do it often. Whatever that means!

Religion

My Mom was a Jew and my Dad wasn't religiously inclined until later in life. I was raised a fairly liberal Christian. I'd still put myself in that category. I believe that Christ was the son of God, but I'm not a holy roller. Many devout Christians would be appalled by some of my beliefs.

Example: As a libertarian I think that drugs and prostitution should be legal. A problem with conservative Christians? I'd say so!

What religion should you be? I don't think you have to be a specific religion, but I do think you have to belief in God. I have a hard time understanding people who don't. The idea that this whole planet and all the people here were a result of some mega, cosmic accident? I don't think so. But, that's MY opinion.

Exercise

I need to work out. If I don't I fell really crappy. I try and do some aerobic exercise at least 4 or 5 times a week. If I don't, it's because I'm traveling or I'm sick. I'm also going to try and start doing some yoga and some other strength exercises.

Food

I don't live to eat. I eat to live. I'm just as happy eating peanut butter and jelly on whole wheat toast (75% peanut butter; 25% jelly) than I am at a fancy 5 star restaurant. I RARELY feel like it was worth it when I go out and spend a lot of money on food. I'd much rather go to a GOOD restaurant than to an expensive one.

I LOVE Indian food and I don't eat sushi. I can't stand the smell of fish being cooked in the house. One time, when someone pan friend some fish, I couldn't go into the house for a couple of days without gagging and then had to throw out the pan. Go figure.

I'm a pretty good cook. I think I got it from my Mom. She was a great cook. No one that I've ever gone out with has been a good cook. It's not something I expect or need. I cook a REALLY good spicy spaghetti sauce.

If you are a food freak, I can deal with that. I'll go with you but will probably just order the chicken!

What's Fun for me?

I'm not a big drinker. I have a beer after working out but have no serious interest in drinking. I think that has a lot to do with the fact that I can get pretty relaxed and do crazy stuff even when I'm completely sober. I DO like to go to movies and theatre. I also tend to be a bit of a night owl. I don't mind going out late. I like to go out dancing on rare occasions and I'm a fairly decent dancer. Going out to eat is OK, but as I said, food is not the most important thing for me.

I really like to take short trips to fun places like San Francisco. I LOVE that city. My schedule is usually flexible enough that I can take off at a moments notice. Only issue is finding a place for the dogs to stay. I also like going to spas and getting massage is a high priority.

My "typical" night out on a Friday or Saturday would be to go for a bite to eat then go see a movie. Every once in a while to go to a funky club.

I also like to go to someplace warm in the winter at least once or twice. Yes, Las Vegas does get chilly December through February.

Improv Comedy

I would quit everything that I do right now if I got an audition and got accepted at Second City in Chicago. I'd even put up with the wicked cold. I've been doing improv regularly for the past 20 years. I love it. It's more fun than anything but GREAT sex or a GREAT massage.

New York/Las Vegas

I left New York as my primary residence at the beginning of 1999. I had lived there for 20 years but I'd had enough cold weather having grown up in the Philippines. I also was sick and tired of paying 11.5% New York State and City income taxes. When I decided I was going to move I had 4 criteria. First, I wanted a place that was relatively warm in the winter. Secondly a "no tax" state. Third was good value for the dollar in terms of real estate. Lastly, I wanted to live in a city with a world class airport. I narrowed it down to Las Vegas and Tampa and ended up in Vegas. I really miss New York City at times. Particularly in the Summer and Fall. It's really to hot for me in Vegas in the Summer.

Las Vegas isn't a bad place to live. I still feel like a tourist there most of the time. The city has a lot of good things going for it. I RARELY spend time on "The Strip" because of traffic and I don't gamble at all.

I still have a place just outside New York City and spent the last two years splitting my time between the two. I would be in New York from about June til October. Since I didn't want to put the dogs on a plane, I drove back and forth.

I LOVE New York. I'm a theatre-holic. I'm one of the few straight men (as I said before) who enjoys (not ALL the time) show tunes. When I'm in New York I feel very alive. I love the place.

Where to Live?

I hate the cold. That's why I left NYC. I couldn't stand the winters. If I could do it, I'd love to live (hold onto your hat) May and June in New York, July and August somewhere in Europe, September and October back in NYC and then November in Las Vegas, then off to Mexico for December, January and February then back to Las Vegas for March April.

In reality, this probably isn't practical, but there is something that appeals to me about living in multiple places. The dogs make it a big issue because I won't put them on an airplane. That freaks me out.

Dogs

I've got 2 chocolate labs. Coco and Henry. They are like my kids. If you don't like dogs, we have a problem. They are two of the most loving animals on the planet. At night, Henry is on the bed at my feet. The dogs have been in my life for a long time and they won't be leaving until their time has expired.

Music

I like music, but I'm much more of a video/movie person. I like to listen to classic rock, reggae and some mellow jazz depending on my mood. I also think it's a good idea to dance with your partner/lover when you are alone with each other. I got this from being at a GREAT seminar called "Sharing the Path" that I took with Robert and Judith Gass. If you're interested in this kind of thing, go to www.SacredUnion.com. I highly recommend it.

News Junkie

I like to keep fairly close tabs on current events. I watch cable news a lot and enjoy reading the paper when I have time.

Jacuzzi

I like getting in the jacuzzi (I actually went to graduate school with Ken Jacuzzi - who it was named for) at the end of the day after having worked hard and then worked out. It's better than taking baths because there is more room and the water can be kept at a consistent temperature AND you're outdoors to boot. If you're freaked out by the neighbors seeing you naked (although I've never seen them try and look), we're probably not a good match.

Money

I love to make money and GENERALLY hate to spend it. I'm pretty frugal. I will spend virtually anything on education and travel, however. The travel is almost always done in a non-five star manner. I like to do the "local" thing wherever I go.

Writing

I try and write 4 books a year. I used to hate writing. Now it's actually getting easier. This piece was actually very easy for me to put together. Some of my other writing has been a lot more difficult.

Extrovert

I'm an extreme extrovert. Although I like to be alone on occasion, I prefer to be around lots of people. I like entertaining and inviting people over. Not all the time, but it doesn't bother me if friends just stop by unannounced.

Previous Relationships

I've been married more than once and I don't know if I really want to be married again. I am VERY interested in a committed relationship but don't know if that must include marriage. If it is important to someone who I'm in love with, I would consider it.

As a result of going to limited amounts of therapy (which I believe in on a SHORT TERM basis) I have discovered my pattern WAS to find people who needed help or fixing in some way. I no longer want to do that. I want to find someone who is already fully functional. Whatever that means!

What I'm Looking for:

Am I looking for Ms Perfect?

Hardly. I'm a flawed person. All of us are to some extent. I'd like to think I'm getting better all the time and I think that most of my friends would agree.

Intelligence

I'm very attracted to smart women. I frankly wouldn't care if someone were smarter than me. I'm just not intimidated by highly intelligent women. BUT, I don't want someone who is a ball-buster. And in my experience, those two sometimes go together. I have plenty of tough people and situations to deal with at work. The last thing I want or need is someone who is argumentative and difficult at home.

Physically

I really no longer have a physical type.

I'm often attracted to relatively petite to average sized women of any hair color. I think I'm attracted to women who are more on the petite side because I'm not a big muscle bound guy and feel more like a "man" when I can feel as if I'm able to hold and cradle someone easily. If you find yourself reading this and think we have a match in all the other areas, ignore this one as long as you're height and weight proportional. Although the physical items are important to me, others issues are FAR more important.

Speaking of Body . . . I'm an ass man. I've never been attracted to large breasts, but I love a nice butt. What can I tell you? This is who I am. Does this mean that I won't go out or I can't be attracted to anyone else? No. But, from experience, I can tell you what I do and don't like.

What I'm looking for Age Wise

Why do I say 28-40 when I'm 48. Because I get along better with people who are younger than me. Always have. Don't know if I always will, but that's the way I feel right now. My last two relationships were with women about 20 years younger than me. Age was not the problem. I think that having grown up outside the US and having a father who married a 27 year old when he as 63 makes it so I have few "hang-ups" in this area. I think it's hard enough to find someone you can get along with, much less put age restrictions on people. If that's a big deal for you, it probably isn't a good fit.

Someone Positive

You don't have to be up or positive ALL the time. Heck, no one is if they are being real. What I mean is that you see the glass as half full, not half empty. I'm just happy to be on the planet. I get up just about every day and thank God I'm here. Seriously. If you're someone to constantly complain and find fault with things, we're probably not a good match.

Someone Who LOVES Animals

Dogs. I LOVE my dogs. They are part of me and my life. I have 2 chocolate labs and they are amazing. Anyone who I go out with will have to love dogs as well. I contribute to dog causes and believe that most dogs are better than most people I know.

In my last relationship I was exposed to cats. I can't say that I love them as much as dogs, but I certainly don't mind them at all anymore. Cats can be pretty cool.

One of my dogs sleeps on the bed. If that bothers you, I'm sorry. The dogs were here first.

Someone Who Doesn't Avoid Confrontation

My last relationship was with someone whose parents never raised their voices to each other. Not true in my house growing up. We yelled and screamed when we were pissed off. This is certainly not what I want to be doing, but occassionally I can get upset. Hell, I'm a passionate person. Every once in a while I get angry and raise my voice. I don't like it when I do this, but it's been known to happen. Luckily, it happens with less and less frequency as I get older. The major reason why I have raised my voice of late is when the person I've been with has refused to communicate. I guess that I have raised my voice to try and get someone to talk and discuss the major issues. It there is an "issue" that needs to be discussed, in my opinion, it should be discussed and settled as soon as possible. Physical violence, in either direction, is intolerable and unacceptable to me.

Someone Who Doesn't See Money as the Be All and End All

I make a decent living but I've got really simple taste. I also project I'll be making a lot more money in the future. What I do can be very lucrative. I want to be with someone who can be as comfortable on the beach in Costa Rica in a grass hut as they would be at the Plaza Hotel in NYC. I don't need to be spending a lot of money to have fun and enjoy life. I love to make money and I tend to be fairly tight about spending it. Except on education and travel. I'll spend virtually any amount of money to learn how to do something better.

If I ever felt that someone was interested in me for anything financial that would completely turn me off. You don't have a relationship with a bank account, you go out with a PERSON. Having money to do things is fun, but it won't change who someone is as a human being.

If a woman makes more money than me, that's fine. If someone has a trust fund, that's fine. It won't make a lot of difference either way. I'm happy I'm not poor, but more importantly, I keep my overhead low so my level of stress is very low. I'd like to keep it this way.

If I know that someone REALLY likes something I will usually spare no expense to get it for them or make it happen. As long as it isn't buying them a sports franchise or an 8 carat diamond.

Politically

For some people this can be a big deal. No matter what you believe I expect you to be respectful of my opinions and beliefs. I'll do the same. If Mary Matlin and James Carville can live together, then anyone can. If you want to get an idea of what I believe in, take a look at: www.LP.org. I don't believe in everything Libertarians believe in, but MOST of it makes sense to me.

"Sit on the Couch" Factor

I want someone who I can sit down on the couch and talk with for hours at a time. In my last relationship she could last about 20 minutes and then had to leave. She didn't like "going deep." I had a really hard time with this. I like to really get to know someone and how they think and feel about things. Talk about what? Philosophy, politics, movies, whatever. Just talk. I like to talk. Even though I do a lot of it for a living, it's still something I like to do. After doing a seminar sometimes I'm all talked out, but for the most part, I enjoy talking with someone. Don't worry, I can and do like to be quiet at times, but it isn't often to be honest.

Independence

One thing I really liked in my last relationship was that I could go away on a business trip and not HAVE to call in every night. I'm not looking for a woman who feels like she has to know precisely where I am every minute of the day. I certainly don't have to know where someone else is either. Works both ways.

Trust

I need to be around someone I can trust. When you say you'll do something, you do it. I like that. I can both give and get the same way on that concept. This hasn't been a big issue for me. I've been pretty lucky being with people who didn't deceive me in this area.

Relationship "Contract"

I think that everyone has a different view of relationships. Some people do things one way and others do them another way. I just feel that what ever two people agree to, they should honor their contract. If you say you'll do it a certain way then do it that way! Bottom line: don't be a liar.

Work

I LOVE what I do. I know I'm lucky. Many people don't. If YOU don't love what you're doing or you're on the path to finding it, it probably won't work out. I think that people have a hard time in their relationships when they are struggling to be happy with what they do. I don't really care what you do, but it's important that you love it.

Overseas Experience/Background

This isn't a deal killer for me but it's a huge part of who I am. Growing up in a foreign country makes you think differently. One of the reasons why I got into my last relationship was because of the fact that she had grown up overseas like I had. This isn't crucial, but an openness to other countries and other peoples is important to me.

I also like to travel overseas and wouldn't really like to do it alone all the time. I hope that a person that I found to be with would be open to traveling outside the country as well.

Live for Today AND Tomorrow

I ended a relationship with someone recently who said she wanted to travel when she "retired." I want to "retire" right now. I want to live the life I want NOW. Who knows how long we'll be around? This doesn't mean that you throw caution completely to the wind, but it does mean you need a balance between saving for tomorrow and living for today.

What I Don't Want:

I don't want someone who doesn't want to share their feelings. I've been with women like that I can't do it. I don't want to try and figure out what people want. It's too complicated. I 'm definitely NOT your typical male according to the Mars-Venus equation.

*************

Thanks for taking the time to read all of this. If and when you meet me you'll find I'm pretty much what I've detailed here. If you like what you've read, send email to me at: fredgleeck@mac.com. I look forward to getting together to see what can happen between us.